La's Blog

2006-06-02T08:33:00.000-05:00

ok, so David told me he saw this on his friend's blog and was doing it so i stalked her through him cause I was bored while the baby i'm keeping sleeps so I could do it...lame, i know

A - Available: nope, gladly taken! :)
A - Age: 20...oldness is no good
A - Annoyance: fakeness and inconsideration

B - Best Friend: David :)
B - Beer: michelob ultra is my favorite ;) or not...
B- Birthday: dec.8

C - Crush: a huge one!
C - Car: 1999 green civic...James is the best car ever! (lol, so David named his car Tamara and so then I had to name mine James... ;))
C - Candy: anything chocolate

D - Day or night: night
D - Dream Car: i don't really think i have a dream car...though the BMW convertible i rode in the other week was pretty nice
D - Dog or cat: so i have never been a huge fan of either...till we went to go look at puppies. i still hate cats tho

E - Easiest person to talk to: David and mom
E - Eggs: in tuna! ;)
E - Email: all i get is junk and the occasional CNN article from my very educated boyfriend ;)

F - Favorite color: pink
F - Favorite Month: December...it's my birthday and Jesus' birthday. it doesn't get much better than that.
F - Favorite Memories: family trips to the beach, road trips and special days with David :)

G - Gummy Bears or Worms: bears...i haven't had worms in so long!
G - Giver or taker: i hope i'm a giver, but i feel like a taker most of the time
G - Gold or Silver: usually silver, but thanks to Susie and David, gold is growing on me :)

H - Hair Color: brownish...tho its been a long time since it was actually that color
H - Height: 5'5" i think
H - Happy: except for the fact that David is 150 miles away, yes very!

I - Ice Cream: coffee
I - Instrument: eh. i love my musician friends (which most of my friends are) but I am not so cultured as they
I - Idol: i hope i don't have any

J - Jewelry: i wear the same every day...boring, i know
J - Job: sperry...thats right, construction ;)
J - Jail: not yet...

K - Kids: i love them and can't wait to have my own!
K - kickboxing or karate: i've never done either, but i think i would choose kickboxing if i had to
K - Kindergarten: Mrs. Shingler was awesome

L - Longest Car Ride: Tally to NYC...thats a long way! though i guess it was a bus ride not a car ride. i guess the longest car ride was maybe to san antonio...well that was a van ride. whatever. the keys was a long way too
L - Longest relationship: 1 amazing year and going strong :)
L - Last Kiss: um, monday before David left me ;) i kissed lucy kerwin this morning, but i don't think that counts

M - Milk Flavor: chocolate of course
M - Most missed person(s): Nate...lol, just kidding! i think that if you've read this till now, you probably can figure out who i'm missing ;)
M - Movie Last Watched: um, Along Came Polly...funny movie!

N - Number of Siblings: 6
N - Number of Tattoos: 0...i don't want one bad enough to inflict pain on myself
N - Name: i have lots of favorites

O - One Wish: the summer would pass quickly
O - One Phobia: graduating and still not having a plan
O - One regret: not going to bed earlier last night

P - Pet Peeves: leaving cabinets open
P - Part of your appearance you like best: my regular legs ;) lol, no i dunno
P - Part of your Personality you like best: i think i usually stay on a pretty even keel...usually

Q - Quote: "Bears..." lol, i do kinda miss nate ;)
Q - Quick or Slow: some of both
Q - Quiet or Loud: i think there is a time and a place for both

R - Reason to smile: God's love, being in love
R - Reality TV Show: eh
R - Reasons to cry: leaving Gainesville, being hurt

S - Song Last Heard: Carrying your Love with Me when my phone rang
S - Season: I'm always ready for the next one when it comes around
S - Shoe: flip flops

T - Time you woke: 7:00
T - Time Now: i've been walking away and coming back for like 2 hours, but its almost noon right now
T - Time for bed: whenever it gets quiet around the house

U - U love someone: lots of people!
U - Unpredictable: i don't think so much
U - Underwear: is this a yes or no question?

V - Vegetable you hate: brussel sprouts...i gagged the one time my mom made me eat them
V - Vegetable you love: broccoli, squash, spinach, green beans...most of them
V - Vacation spot: anywhere there's a beach

W- Worst Habits: not getting up in the morning
W- Where are you going to travel next?: G'ville on Sunday
W- Weather right : that weird sun/cloud mix and hot and humid

X - X-Rays: i don't think i've ever had x-rays taken except of my teeth
X - X-Rated Porn: what about it?
X - X-tra special someone: my Davily Wavily Puppily Wuppily ;) gag...

Y - Year you were born: 85...odd years are better
Y - Year it is now: 2006
Y - Yellow: i like it

Z - Zoo Animal: monkeys
Z - Zodiac: no idea
Z - Zoolander: a movie that i watched cause i guess everyone should see it, but that i will probably never watch again

lol, i hate these things but can't help doing them, ya know? anyway, i hope everyone is having a great summer...sorry i haven't been updating, but life isn't really that exciting these days. Just workin and usually in Orlando or Tally on the weekends...well thats exciting but the working not so much :)

Home again...

2006-05-07T22:22:00.000-05:00

Home again, jiggity jog. Home again, home again to buy a fat hog. Lol, that's what my mom used to always say when we got home...don't ask cause I sure don't know :)

So, I'm home again for another summer. It's so crazy how fast the time goes. It feels like yesterday that I was coming home from my first year. A lot of things are different now than they were then, but its good things! :) And, it's good to be home. I miss David terribly already (yea, its been like 36 hours...) but I get to see him in 5 days (and hopefully like every 5 days after that) so I think we will make it :) I'm excited to start work Wednesday. It will be nice to get settled into a schedule. It always takes some adjusting to come home. We had to find me a bed and rearrange the house so I could have a place to stay...ok, so not the whole house, but still. I feel bad for kicking abs out of her "room", but she's a good sport. It's only for 3 months...we will make it work.

Everyone has been asking me what I'm going to do with my life after next year. The answer, in case you were thinking about asking, is I DON'T KNOW! lol, I wish I had a definite answer, but I don't. Oh well...I know it sounds cliche, but I really do trust God's plans and I believe that he has something awesome in store for me. I just hope I get to know what it is soon :)

Anyways, I hope that everyone had an awesome year. Here's to an awesome summer! :)

wow....

2006-05-02T21:59:00.000-05:00

My "junior" year is over! I turned in my last paper this morning...a very happy thing. A little scared that my senior year of college is looming, but excited about what God is doing :)

oh, and I still have the best boyfriend ever, just in case anyone forgot ;)

2006-04-03T08:26:00.000-05:00

Go Gators!!!!

Yep...

2006-03-28T14:23:00.000-05:00

For those of you who are wondering, I am indeed still alive! I figured I would give a quick update for all y'all who depend on the blogging world to know what's going on in the lives of your friends and for my boyfriend who knows everything that happens but likes to read it nonetheless ;)

Spring break was awesome! David and I and our roommates (his and mine respectively) went to the Keys and stayed at Ashley's uncle's house. The boys did some diving and we hung out at the beach....a week of relaxing and sun. I could definitely get used to that lifestyle. We also spent some time in Orlando with David's family and in Ft. Lauderdale with Ashley's family so that was good too.

Coming back was no fun, but classes are going pretty well. Only like another month so that's for real happy...except then I have to leave David here and go home for the summer but I will deal wait as long as possible to deal with that.

The Gators are in the Final Four! They play George Mason Saturday...GM beat UNC a victory will be twice as sweet :) Go Gators!

I think thats a good note to end on :) I hope that everyone's spring is going well...hang in there!

Thoughts about Valentine's Day

2006-02-14T09:45:00.000-05:00

So, I know I haven't posted in forever and I really should be writing a paper instead of posting right now...oh well :)

As Valentine's Day was getting closer, I was thinking about why we should celebrate it. My family has always given eachother candy and cards and stuff and my grandparents send stuff so, while its never been a romantic holiday for me, I have always celebrated it in some way. But you know, there are those people who wear black to protest and think its a bunch of unnecessary hype and all that. So I was thinking how would I explain to them why I like to do special things for Valentine's day....especially now that I have a very special guy :) A lot of people say that you should celebrate love every day so there shouldn't be one day set aside that's more special than others. I definitely agree that we should celebrate love everyday, but what's wrong with having a day set aside to celebrate in a special way. It's kinda the same as a birthday...hopefully you are thankful to be alive every day, but there's that one day set aside to celebrate your birth and life. I'm sure that Valentine's day isn't very special for those who wait till days like today and then express their love...those who only do special things on "special" days. But if today is only an extension of everyday expressions and actions of love, then I think its special and should be celebrated.

Maybe these are just the ramblings of a girl in love...which is definitely what I am :)...but those are my thoughts. Make sure that the people you love know it today, and every day!

Drop

2006-01-12T12:09:00.000-05:00

I just dropped my first class...I guess technically its not a drop cause it's still during drop/add but still. I've never changed my schedule around after classes start or decided not to take a class cause I thought I couldn't do it....until now. It really was a pretty ridiculous class tho. I really liked the teacher and the subject matter...19th century British lit concerning Judiasm. It is an upper level english elective which i've taken here so I knew it would be a lot of reading, but a lot is a huge underestimate! The required texts for the class were like 8 novels plus a course pack that was 5 volumes long...4 more novels and other assorted writings. For lots of the meeting days, a whole novel was the required reading for class. On top of that, it was a 3 hour class that meets from 7-10 on Wednesday nights, after I have another 3 hour class before that. I was sitting in class debating with myself whether or not I should stay in. I would really like to take the class, but I just don't have that much time to commit to one class. And i'm not even an English major. Oh well...I guess stuff happens. I'm taking an online psych class on eating disorders instead, so that should be interesting.

Otherwise my classes are good...Adolescent Psych, Bioethics, Philosophy of Social Science, a Geo lab, and TA for personality psych. I think it will be a good semester...regardless of the rocky start :)

El fin!

2005-12-13T01:25:00.000-05:00

Wow...I can't believe i'm done with another semester. The end of my last exam this afternoon marked the halfway point of my college career (well, this part at least...). Thats crazy. Ashley and I went to dinner last night and she said, "man, it feels like we just got here". It really does...time flies. You always hear people say that it will be over before you know it and that really is true. Dern, i'm old! ;)

It was a good semester, though it had its ups and downs...God has been good, as always, and taught me lots of cool stuff about himself and maybe just a little more about the plan he has for me. He gave me the awesome blessing of David...i'm so thankful! It's so awesome to have someone to laugh with, cry with (God knew I would need a shoulder this semester especially), and just experience life with. David is more than I could ever have asked or hoped for...but that's how God works, huh?!

So, while I can't believe another semester is over, i'm looking forward to the break (though I have to be away from David for 2 weeks :() and the next semester. I know that God has some exciting things in store and I can't wait to get a glimpse of what he's going to do! :)

Thanks :)

2005-12-10T12:43:00.000-05:00

Thanks to everyone for the birthday comments/messages! :) I had a really good birthday, despite the oldness. It was pretty chill...we just hung out all afternoon then David took me to dinner and I subjected him to The Notebook ;) He is a good sport! :)

Only one more exam and then I will be done! I suppose I should start studying at some point...hopefully that will happen today. We'll see :)

Dern!

2005-12-08T11:26:00.000-05:00

so, my dad called this morning (at 8:15, no less) to wish me a happy birthday...and then he told me i'm old. lol, actually he said, "I remember the day you were born" which is what he says every year, but then he said...that was 20 years ago!! dern, that really is a long time. and ok, if your parents tell you you're old, then it must be true cause that means they're admitting that they are old ;) for real tho, i'm not so sure how I feel about all of this oldness...oh well, i guess it happens. I will take my pills now and then go play bingo.... ;)

2005-12-03T02:02:00.000-05:00

I have the best boyfriend ever! :) Just in case anyone was wondering...

Yay!

2005-12-01T23:35:00.000-05:00

So as of 3 this afternoon, I am done with 3 of my classes! That is happy :) This week has been kinda crazy. I had two tests today so i'm really glad all of that is over. Now, I just have geography and behavior analysis tests on Tuesday and then a BA exam next monday and i'll be done! I'm not so sure how I got off so easy this semester but i'm not complaining. I am sad for ashley tho...she has a test tomorrow night (a friday night test is no fun) and 5 exams next week, 3 of which are on the same day. :(

So, since I have nothing to do (finally!), I think I will move toward bed!

Another weekend gone...

2005-11-21T00:32:00.000-05:00

Man, I can't believe another weekend is over. It was a good one tho :) Friday night I got off work and David took me to dinner. We went to a new place and had a good time. He's the best :) Then we went back to his place to drink hot chocolate and watch a movie. Well, I ended up watching the movie by myself cause he was asleep within like 10 minutes...oh well, it was still a good time :) Then Saturday morning I slept in and then went back to David's and he made breakfast and we got ready to go to Tampa for Kristin's wedding. The wedding was good...it was a nice ceremony and it was good to see her and everyone else. I'm happy for her and they're gonna be moving to Gainesville for awhile so thats happy! It was a good day...I like weddings :) Then I came home and worked on papers a little and went to bed. This morning we got up and went to church. It was good...we hadn't been here for church in several weeks so it was nice to be back. Then we went to lunch with several of David's friends so that was fun. Then I came home and wrote all afternoon :( I was really wishing I had gotten more done before today. Oh well. Then David came and we took a study break to starbucks...my favorite :) Then I had to write some more...i finally finished a few minutes ago. My eyes are so tired! I'm done tho so thats happy! So yea, other than the writing, it was a good weekend.

Tomorrow i'm working all day then I have a meeting on campus then I need to get some stuff done cause i'm leaving after class Tuesday morning to go home. Then we're heading to SC till Saturday...it should be fun. It will be good to see family. I just wish I didn't have so much to do in the next couple of weeks so I could enjoy it more. Oh well, such is life.

Since I probly won't post again...Happy Thanksgiving! I can't believe its already here...time flies when you're old ;)

Habits

2005-11-15T12:08:00.000-05:00

So...Sarah tagged me. I debated whether or not to do this cause I really don't have any unusual habits. I'm quite a normal person, actually. ;) lol, yea right. anyway, after much thought, and help from David (who was quick to name some...hmmm) I thought of some, so here goes.

Ground rules: The 1st player of this "game" starts with the topic "5 weird habits of yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a blog/xanga entry about their weird habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 5 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "You are tagged" in their blog/xanga and tell them to read yours.

1) I have to agree with Sarah about the cabinets thing. Open cabinets drive me CRAZY! I'm not sure what it is...I think that when cabinets are open, the whole kitchen looks messy. David and Nate never close cabinets, so everytime I walk into their kitchen I close all the cabinets. On the rare occasion that David does close cabinets, he slams them. That really bugs me...I think I prefer him leaving them open to slamming them shut. Lol, sounds like I have a cabinet complex or something. Anyway, yea, closing cabinets is definitely a habit I have.

2) When its raining and I have my windshield wipers on (which I do when it rains so I guess thats redundant), I always turn off the wipers before I turn off the car because I hate it when the wipers are left in the upright position. Ugh, that bugs me so bad. If I leave them on and they're up, I turn the car back on to turn them off. Ok, so now its sounding like I have OCD tendencies. I guess my true nature is showing itself... ;)

3) I always clean the kitchen before I cook. I clean up after too, but I can't stand to cook in a dirty kitchen. I guess it doesn't seem very efficient, but oh well.

4) I take two showers most days. I like to take one in the morning to wake up and be fresh for the day. But I also like to take one to relax before I go to bed. My family thinks i'm crazy, but oh well. At least I don't smell bad...

5) I talk to other drivers on the road. It's not like I have road rage...I don't yell or flick people off. I just talk to them conversationally like they can hear me. I ask them nicely to get over and to move out of my way. (Well, I guess its not always nice...I do get frustrated sometimes.) The funny thing is, it works! I was driving back from Ft. Lauderdale Sunday and it was pretty crazy...everyone was making fun of me, but everytime I would talk to another driver, they would do what I asked. See, being nice does pay off! ;)

wow, I definitely rambled :) but there ya go

Back to reality...

2005-11-14T21:49:00.000-05:00

You know when you have a really good weekend and you just want it to go on forever? Yea, well thats how I feel. We had a great time in Ft. Lauderdale...we hung out with Ashley's family, went to the beach (always a plus), David dove and didn't die (tho there was a close call or two)...it was a good time :) I definitely didn't want to come back tho. Oh well, life must go on.

Today was good for a monday...i went to work for a few hours, came home and wasted time (which i should've used to write those papers that still haven't been started), then went to class for 3 hours. Going to that class is getting easier and easier. That's a good thing cause I have two 3 hour blocks in a row next semester :( I'm excited about being a TA for that class next time tho. The teacher is cool and I think it will be a good experience. It makes me feel old tho...oh well, that happens (frequently these days).

So yea, this week I have to write 3 papers and I want to get ahead on my wildlife homework. I have two tests the week after Thanksgiving so I want to get a headstart. Otherwise tho, this week won't be too crazy I don't think. I'm still waiting to hear what we're gonna do for Thanksgiving. I think if my cousin wins his game this weekend, we will go there. Otherwise, they will come here. It will be good to see them...tho I am kinda hoping it will be that they come here so we don't have to travel and I can go to the FSU game. Either way tho, it will be cool.

This is my favorite time of year...the holidays are starting, the weather is changing (sort of but at least its not hot), my birthday is soon ;) I'm trying to remember to sit back and enjoy it instead of being stressed out and so crazy busy all the time. Ironic that life gets more busy during the times we're supposed to relax and enjoy it the most. I guess its a good lesson in patience and trust...I know I have a lot to learn!

2005-11-10T17:42:00.000-05:00

So i'm sitting here thinking about the 3 papers I have due next monday (the 21st....not like 4 days from now) but not finding the motivation to get started on them. Oh well, that will happen I guess.

This week was pretty good. Ashley got really sick so I was a little worried, but she's fine now. I guess the week wasn't very exciting cause I can't really think of anything else that happened.

We had a really good time with David's family in North Carolina last weekend. Tomorrow we're heading to Ft. Lauderdale...David is diving so that will be fun for him. We are gonna stay at Ashley's house so that should be fun. It's always good to get away from Gainesville for a few days (although I feel like all i've done the last couple of weeks is travel). Then next weekend is Kristin's wedding in Tampa so we'll go down there Saturday. The next week after that its Thanksgiving! Man, its scary how fast its going by.

Happy Veteran's Day...i hope everyone has a great long weekend! :)

sick :(

2005-11-02T11:30:00.000-05:00

I got sick last night :( I dunno what it is, just some kind of virus thing I think. Whatever it is, it is no fun and definitely kept me up all night. Believe it or not, this is the first time i've been sick since being down here...like a year and a half or something. I don't like being sick without my mom. I'm a big girl I know, but there's just something a mom can do to make you feel better that no one else can do, ya know? it's all good tho...I have the best roommate and boyfriend ever so I will be ok :)

That ain't right...

2005-11-01T10:58:00.000-05:00

Does it strike anyone else as wrong that I have to pay $500 a month to live on campus so that the UF pres can make $400,000 a year? Yes, for real.

2005-10-25T09:34:00.000-05:00

"Again I say, don't get involved in foolish, ignorant arguments that only start fights. The Lord's servants must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone. They must be able to teach effectively and be patient with difficult people. They should gently teach those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people's hearts, and they will believe the truth. Then they will come to their senses and escape from the Devil's trap. For they have been help captive by him to do whatever he wants."

2 Timothy 2:23-26 (NLT)

encouragement from Psalms

2005-10-23T18:33:00.000-05:00

Praise the Lord!
For he has heard my cry for mercy.
The Lord is my strength, my shield from every danger.
I trust in him with all my heart.
He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy.
I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.
The Lord protects his people
and gives victory to his anointed king.
Save your people!
Bless Israel, your special possession!
Lead them like a shepherd,
and carry them forever in your arms.

Psalm 28:6-9

early morning excitement...

2005-10-20T19:38:00.000-05:00

ahhh the joys of dorm life...

"hm, what is that noise? am i awake or dreaming? oh, dern, its a fire alarm!" That was my thought process when I was awakened this morning. I looked out the window to make sure that people were leaving, and sure enough they were starting to gather. See, Murphree residents are now used to fire alarms...we've had at least 3, all of which have been on Thursday mornings. So, i just figured this was another drill. Well, I thought that until, as I grabbed my keys off the desk to walk downstairs, I looked at my computer and saw that it was 3:45 in the morning!! I was less than enthused...i think i had been asleep maybe 2 hours. So, we congregated downstairs, many people complaining that they hadn't even been to bed yet. We're all wondering when it will end and what's going on (obviously not a drill in the middle of the night) when one of the RA's walked by. He says, "yea, it could be awhile. a drunk guy in section A decided to spray the fire extinguisher all over their kitchen so we have to wait for the fire department to clear it out." oh my gosh...i was so mad. It's one thing if there really is a fire or something serious, but come on! It's the middle of the night and we all had to wake up and stand outside for an hour because a stupid drunk guy decided to pull a prank. That is not ok with me. So, finally at like 4:30, they let us back in. I think i fell asleep again at like 5 and then woke up again a few hours later. Needless to say, not my favorite way to spend an hour in the middle of the night. I want to find out who that guy was...

St. Augustine

2005-10-16T20:55:00.000-05:00

Ashley, John, David and I went to St. Augustine today...I love it there! I think it might be one of my most favorite places. We had a good lunch, enjoyed walking around the town, and a walk on the beach. It was nice to get away from Gainesville and school work for a day.

It was a good weekend...Friday night we went to see Elizabethtown...it was good. Kinda different and random, but entertaining. It had really good music too. Then Saturday, we watched the game. It was not so much a happy game for us, but then FSU lost too so that made it better! ;) I'm a little more encouraged about our chances in that game now that they've lost some of their momentum...we will see on Nov 26!

So, yea, now back to "homework"... ;)

Finally!

2005-10-13T21:22:00.000-05:00

Classes are finally over for the week! It was a long one...I had 2 tests Tuesday and one today, a quiz tonight, working on a presentation, lots of Wildlife work to catch up on (before the test...i procrastinated a little too long... ;)). But its finally all over. Well sort of...i have stuff i should do over the weekend but i'll worry about that later :) For now i'm just going to enjoy being done.

Important Life Q's

2005-10-11T10:11:00.000-05:00

Can I be done with college yet?
What do I want to do after college?
Do I really want to be in school for at least 4 more years?
What will I do after that?
What's God's plan in all of this?

These are questions I ponder frequently but actually right now all i want to know is, is it friday yet? :)

home again, home again...

2005-10-06T09:42:00.000-05:00

So, i'm leaving this afternoon to go home again. This weekend is homecoming so there are no classes tomorrow...not that it matters cause i don't have class on friday anyway....but i got off of work so I could have a long weekend in Tally. I'm excited cause last weekend was pretty crazy and i feel like i didn't get to talk to my mom at all, so hopefully this weekend will be more chill and i'll get more quality time with the family. Saturday is Grace's 16th birthday party...gosh, i'm old. That should be fun tho. My grandparents are coming down and i haven't seen them in awhile so that will be good. Karina has a concert Friday night that i'm going to so that will be fun too. I'm glad i'm not too far away to miss out on stuff like that :) Off to a fun filled afternoon of errands and class...

good times :)

2005-10-02T23:10:00.000-05:00

It was a good weekend at home. We got to Tally about 10 Friday night and hung out with my family. Saturday we didn't do a whole lot...neither did the Gators...and then went to Tam's party. It was fun to see everyone and catch up! Today was church and family stuff then we headed back. A good time! :) My grandparents will be in town next weekend for Grace's party so i'm excited to see them. I think I will be tired of traveling after next weekend, but its worth it :) Now off to a new week....

God's Amazing Love

2005-09-28T23:29:00.000-05:00

God has been teaching me some really cool stuff about his love and just love in general. The study we're doing this semester is called "The Heartbeat of Jesus: Linking Me with God's Love". It's really cool/challenging/encouraging/amazing to be reminded how awesome God's love for me is and how that's sposed to be translated through my life to others. Anyway, I came across this quote this morning and wanted to share it. It's a reflection on the parable of the Prodigal Son and how that is a picture of God's relationship with us....

"God has never pulled back his arms, never withheld his blessing, never stopped considering his son the Beloved One. But the Father couldn't compel his son to stay home. He couldn't force his love on the Beloved. He had to let him go in freedom, even though he knew the pain it would cause both his son and himself. It was love itself that prevented him from keeping his son home at all cost. It was love itself that allowed him to let his son find his own life, even with the risk of losing it.
"Here the mystery of my life is unveiled. I am loved so much that I am left free to leave home. The blessing is there from the beginning. I have left it and keep on leaving it. But the Father is always looking for me with outstretched arms to receive me back and whisper again in my ear: 'You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests.'"
-Henri Nouwen, The Return of the Prodigal Son

That kind of love is hard for me to grasp. I'm so thankful for it tho, because otherwise there's no hope for me. I pray that God will continue to reveal his love to me and that maybe i'll be able to understand just a little bit of it and be able to appreciate it for the amazing gift that it is.

Excitement

2005-09-26T22:27:00.000-05:00

There's nothing like a flat tire to provide a great start to a monday morning....yep, I left my dorm at 9:15 this morning to head to work. As I got closer to my car, I thought, "something doesn't look right". Well, the back right tire was flat. So, I called Lisa and told her what was up and that I would be late. Then I called David...I definitely didn't know how to change a tire and I knew he would. So, happy for me that I have the best boyfriend ever...he came and changed it and took it to the shop for me so I could go to work. He's the awesomest :)

I talked to my dad in the midst of the excitement this morning and realized I really miss him (and the rest of my family) and am exicted about going home friday. I suppose that first I should focus on my test thats at 8:30 in the morning... :)

Go Gators!

2005-09-18T16:46:00.000-05:00

So, the game last night was very exciting. It was our first real competition this season...and we rose to the challenge! As good of a state as Tennessee is...only because I was born there of course... it was happy to beat them :) I never thought I would say this, but it really is great to be a Florida Gator! ;)

new number

2005-09-10T12:14:00.000-05:00

my new phone number is 352-317-5851...for those of y'all in Tally, sorry to leave the 850 behind. I guess i'm officially a Gainesville citizen now, although i'm not sure how i feel about that... :)

random thoughts

2005-09-09T22:57:00.000-05:00

-quizzes due on friday at midnight are no good (especially cause i'll wait till then to do them ;))
-dinner with friends is always good
-moes is always good
-birthdays are fun
-parking at UF is no good, but finding good spots is happy
-i'm excited to go home tomorrow
-letters from home are happy
-getting packages is fun (even if its books)
-running into random people is happy (I saw Daniel and Vanessa Kuder at Moe's)
-quiet weekends are nice
-i'm tired of making big decisions for myself
-thinking of someone other than yourself when making decisions is a hard adjustment, but it's happy and worth it

ok, i think thats about all thats on my mind tonight... :)

Happy Birthday, David :)

2005-09-08T09:53:00.000-05:00

so i'm now dating an old man. i don't know if thats ok with me... ;)

Love

2005-09-06T10:58:00.000-05:00

I saw this and thought it was cute and very intriguing...

What does love mean?
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?"
The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toe nails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."

Rebecca- age 8

"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."

Billy- age 4

"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."

Karl- age 5

"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your french fries without making them give you any of theirs."

Chrissy- age 6

"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."

Terri- age 4

"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is ok."

Danny- age 7

"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My mommy and daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss."

Emily- age 8

"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."

Bobby- age 7

"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend you hate."

Nikki- age 6

"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."

Noelle- age 7

"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."

Tommy- age 6

"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."

Cindy- age 8

"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."

Clare- age 6

"Love is when mommy gives daddy the best piece of chicken."

Elaine- age 5

"Love is when mommy sees daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."

Chris- age 7

"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."

Mary Ann- age 4

"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."

Lauren- age 4

"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you."

Karen- age 7

"Love is when mommy sees daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."

Mark- age 6

"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."

Jessica- age 8

It's amazing to me how much kids understand about love without really knowing it. So many of the things these kids said are examples of service and sacrifice, which is how we're called to love each other. Their view of love is so simple...the way it should be. We mess it up so much...thinking of it as a emotion and a good feeling that comes and goes. We equate love with feelings and physical things. We base it on what others do for us and fall in and out of what we think is love so easily.
That's not how the Bible talks about love, tho...
I John 3:16, "We know what real love is because Christ gave up his life for us."
1 John 4:10, "This is real love. It is not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins."
1 Corinthians 13:4-8, "Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."

So, real love is not about what you get, but what you give. It's not about having your needs met, but meeting the needs of others, unselfishly and gladly. It's not about feeling a certain way, but acting a certian way-being willing to give up even your life for those you love.

Man...this stuff is really challenging my thinking about love. 1 John promises that my love will be perfected in Christ, so i'm clinging to that promise. In the meantime, I'm challenging myself with I Corinthians 14:1, "Let love be your highest goal..."

happiness :)

2005-09-06T00:11:00.000-05:00

This weekend was happy :)

it was long (although still not long enough...they never are)

the Gators won the first game of the season

starvation and exhaustion resulting in a hilarious wendy's experience :)

Sunday with David's family

car trips and lots of time with the awesomest boyfriend ever

Karina called to tell me about her happy weekend and that made me happy :)

the noles beat the hurricanes...i won't say this often, but...go noles! :)

so, yea...a happy weekend :) now back to reality...i have a test at 8:30 that i have yet to study for

stupid professors...

2005-08-30T10:56:00.000-05:00

Ok, so when you're in a huge lecture hall of 600 students and the professor calls people out for talking but then refuses to use a microphone, thats for real stupid. I mean come on, how realistic is it to expect that many people to be quiet for 2 hours so you can show us again how to access the online materials for the class. The class has met for 3 hours so far and we've done absolutely nothing of consequence. And, he's a profane old man....i love the public university system! :)

Weekend :)

2005-08-27T00:50:00.000-05:00

so...its finally the weekend! I'm for real excited about sleeping in tomorrow :) This week was really good, but not so much sleep. I got up early for work 4 days this week and Thursday i got up early for class so its no good. It was a good week tho...my job is really great. I'm exicited. And my classes are good. I've been to all but one, which meets on Monday night. I don't have any papers yet, so i'm keeping my fingers crossed. That would definitely be a first...a semester without at least like 4 papers. I think i can get used to this :)

other than that...not a lot going on. we bought some new stuff for our room last night, so thats exciting :) Target is one of my favorite places! Oh, and i broke my phone...the display is gone. I can still get and make calls, but thats it. I need to do something, but I havent decided what yet. It's kinda frustrating, but oh well. anyways...I think its about time for bed. have a great weekend!

I'm here :)

2005-08-22T18:08:00.000-05:00

ok, so i'm sitting here at my desk, surrounded by piles of things and not even really caring. :) I wish I was motivated to finish unpacking and organizing, but it just hasn't come yet. other more important things occupied my time this weekend so its all good...it will get done eventually :)

Being back has been good. I got in friday morning and checked in...our dorm is awesome. All of you who have lived in dorms are prolly thinking, "yea right. they're all the same" but its for real nice. They remodeled it last year and everything is new. We have two rooms, which is fun and about half of the Nav population lives here so it will be good times :) Ashley is here now...i haven't seen her yet but it will be fun to get everything settled and organized. I'm really excited about this year.

Then, we had lunch with my dad (my mom couldn't come cause Sus was sick) and David's parents so that was fun. They hadn't met so it was good...i think everyone had a good time. After that, my dad and David and Zhi helped me move my stuff and it really didn't take long. When guys are impressed by your lack of stuff, thats pretty impressive! :) Then my dad left (neither of us cried...impressive) and we ran some errands and stuff. Basically for the rest of the weekend, we just hung out. It was nice to hang out with David without the thought of leaving hanging over, ya know? Being 2 miles away is much better than 290 :) Saturday night we went to dinner with nav people then there was a cookout yesterday so its been fun to hang out and catch up.

Then this morning, life started...no good. I went to work at 9 (which is much better than 7:30 by the way :)). The family i'm working for is really cool tho and i'm excited about being there. The little boy, William, is 5 but he has some neurological delays so he doesn't walk yet or talk much, but it was lots of fun. He's a great kid and i'm excited. I guess if I have to work I'm glad this is it :)

All y'all who are in new places, know that i'm praying for you and keep me updated! :)

"Lauren is"

2005-08-13T19:30:00.000-05:00

ok so when David first told me about this, I thought it was weird, but then I decided to do it and it's kinda fun. Here's what you do...search Google for your name and the word "is" in quotes (ex: i typed "Lauren is") and see what comes up. Here are some of the highlights of my search...some of them are pretty accurate ;)

"lauren is a love muffin" (hmmmm)

"Lauren is really pretty" (well thanks :))

"Lauren is a vegetarian" (or not)

"lauren is a 12 times australian national taekwondo champion" (bet you guys didn't know that ;))

"Lauren is the chillest in Laguna Beach" (David that one's for you :))

"Lauren is by far the hottest"

"Lauren is fashion"

"Lauren is in the tub"

"Lauren is internationally known"

"Lauren is a great travel companion"

"Lauren is miserable-and feeling very unlucky"

ok so thats enough...you get the idea. kinda fun if you're bored :)

Summer Happenings

2005-08-13T12:14:00.000-05:00

Man...I can't believe the summer is over. I'm leaving in 6 days to go back to Gainesville. On one hand, it feels like just yesterday when my mom and I packed up my room and drove home. On the other hand, it feels like it has been so long and that the 19th can't get here fast enough. It was a really good summer overall, tho. God has been doing some really cool things...

My time with my family has been great. I was a little apprehensive at the end of spring semester cause I knew it would be a hard transition...going from living on my own back to being part of a family and being in my parents' house. While there were some issues...sleeping in the middle of the house and all the interruptions that go along with that, being on other people's schedules, finding the fine line b/w dependence on my parents and independence, just to name a few :)...for the most part, the transition was smooth and the time has been great. I've had some good times hanging out with my sibilings and that has been a blessing. Being away, I feel like I never know what's going on in their lives so it's been good (for the most part anyway) to feel involved again. My time with my parents has been awesome too. I feel like God is really showing me the amazing source of wisdom my parents are and that's been cool to see. So, as I get ready to leave, I am sad to leave my family again but i'm thankful for the time God has given us this summer.

My job has been cool too. I'm not crazy about the whole office thing and i'm sure I don't wanna do that with the rest of my life, but it has been a blessing this summer. I really like the people at Sperry and the environment is cool...its like a big family (dysfunctional at times like all families :)) and its just cool to see how everyone works together and stuff. I met tons of people so that was fun....there's never a dull moment around there! :) Everyone there wants me to drop out of school and keep working, but since i'm not gonna do that, they've settled for my word that i'll be back next summer. So thats the plan at this point, unless God has other plans. Job security is a happy thing :) It's just cool how God provided this...he basically dropped it in my lap. He did that a lot this summer...

My job for the upcoming year is another example of God's working. I had been wondering/praying about what I would do. I could have the same job with catering that I had last year but wasn't crazy about that idea. I knew I wanted to do something with kids but I just wasn't sure where to start. I started looking around online and found out about a couple of schools and stuff that were hiring and called a couple of places...I was basically just telling God that he would have to show me what to pursue and then provide cause I didn't know what else to do. Well I ended up calling this nanny agency and talked to the girl for a long time and was really interested. I called back and talked to the lady who owns the place and set up an appt./interview thing. I wasn't sure if this would work out but I decided I may as well go down and check it out. Well, when I talked to her, she was very interested and stuff and then she said..."ok, well I need someone at my house and I think you would be perfect." i'm like...uh, ok sounds great. :) So, I have a job as a nanny and i'm very excited. I love working with kids and i'm really thankful that God is giving me this opportunity. Again it was just cool to see him work it out. I know he's always working, but it's so awesome when he lets us see it, ya know?

Another thing God provided above and beyond my expectations was my car. Coming home at the beginning of the summer I knew that the plan was for me to get a car. I had been praying about it but as I got home and my dad didn't really seem concerned about looking, i was kinda discouraged. He would keep his eyes open and occasionally look at something but we were thinking we didn't have much money to spend we weren't really finding anything so it just wasn't working out. Well, I don't really know what happened, but we ended up having more money and he was finally ready to look to buy...I didn't ask questions I just went along :) I really wanted a honda but everything we were finding had lots of miles or was too much money. We drove some corollas and stuff but i just wasn't finding the right thing. So one day we went out and looked around all day and still nothing. I was discouraged again. Somehow we ended up talking to these people about a civic and then we went to go look at it. I was excited but tried not to get my hopes up cause i didn't know what my dad was thinking. Anyway, so as not to make a long story even longer :), we got it. I was just so thankful that God provided exactly what I wanted. I had complained for 2 months, worried, figured I would get a piece of junk (again :)), and then he gave me so much more than I expected. Needless to say, I love my car and still sometimes have a hard time believing its mine :)

ok so this is turning out to be really long...so just one more thing God has done this summer...

So there's this guy... :) I won't tell the whole story here (I would love to tell it if you want to ask me :)) but i'm dating the best guy ever (after my dad, of course ;)), David. I went into the summer not at all expecting a relationship, but as I got to know David better, he and God began to change my mind and heart. It's been really cool how God has revealed himself to us through the process and its so refreshing to be in a relationship that I believe is honoring God, our parents, and eachother. If you would like details, I will gladly share :)

So...these things have been the highlights of my summer. God has taught me a lot that I'm excited to take back to Gainesville with me and i'm excited about what he is going to continue to do.

soo liiike... ;)

2005-08-10T09:15:00.000-05:00

Ok, so now that it's been two months since I updated...I thought I was done with this thing. My summer schedule hasn't really lent itself to blogging....the slow internet, boringness of work, etc. just made me wonder if it was really worth it. I think, tho, i've decided tho being away at school (and everyone else being away at school), it is a good way to keep in touch and know what's going on with everyone, so I think i will keep it up. There have been some exciting things going on, so as I get ready to go back to school, be looking for a summer update...I know the anticipation is more than you can handle :)

For Ellen

2005-08-02T15:11:00.000-05:00

Third Day, Steven Curtis Chapman, Mercy Me

I See Love

Some see a teacher
Standing on a hill
Speaking words of wisdom
Some see a healer
Reaching out his hand
To give sight to a blind man
Some see a dreamer
Wasting his life
On what can never be
Some see a fool
Dying for his dreams

But I see love (I see love)
I see love (I see love)
Light of heaven breaking through
Well I see grace (I see grace)
I see God's face (I See Gods face)
Shining pure and perfect love
When I see you
I see love

Some see a prisoner
Alone before his judge
With no one to defend him
Some see a victim
Beaten and abused
With all the world against him
Some see a martyr
Carrying his cross
For what he believes
Some see a hero
Who set his people free

But I see love (I see love)
I see love (I see love)
Light of heaven breaking through
Well I see grace (I see grace)
I see God's face (I See Gods face)
Shining pure and perfect love
When I see you

With your last breath
I see love
Through your death
I see love
I see peace in the eyes of the king
I see hope in your suffering (I see love)
I see a calm in the center of the storm
I see a Saviour

I see love
I see love
Light of heaven breaking through (heaven breaking through)
I see grace
I see God's face
Shining pure and perfect love
When I see you
I see love
When I see you
I see heaven breaking through
See Gods face
Shining pure and perfect love
When I see you
When I see you
When I see you
I see love
I see love
When I see

Some see Him walking from an empty grave

exciting!

2005-06-18T22:50:00.000-05:00

I am now the proud owner of a '99 civic. thats all i have to say about today :)

weekend :)

2005-06-18T00:21:00.000-05:00

Man, this week was crazy...we were out doing something I think every night. It's the weekend now tho, so that's happy :)

We're closer to getting a car so thats exciting. The money stuff is settled, so now we just have to find the right car. Me and dad went out tonight at like 10:30 and saw some good stuff but obviously we didn't talk to anyone, so we're going out again in the morning. I'm just ready to have a car...i'm hoping by my orlando trip (which i'm very excited about :)) to have one but I do want to be sure we get the right thing so i'm trying to be patient and trust my dad's decisions. He does, afterall, have a lot of car buying experience ;)

I've decided that I really like jewelry. Karina and I had a party tonight with Alicia and I found some more stuff that of course I need ;) It was a lot of fun tho. I can't believe that we're old enough to have friends and sibilings who are jewelry consultants...i feel older every day. hmm i guess I am older every day, huh? anyway, y'all know what I mean :)

I don't have too much planned for the rest of the weekend. Tomorrow I was gonna go shopping with Karina and Mrs. Lauren but then my decided we were going car shopping so I guess i'll be doing that most of the afternoon. That's prolly a good thing, being that I have serious self-control issues when I walk into the mall :) I went to Gap this afternoon, not really planning to buy anything. Well, of course, everything was on sale so I had to buy a couple of things. Oh well...at least i'll look cute when i'm broke one day. it'll all be worth it :) Then sunday, most of the family is heading to Destin for the week. Man, it must be nice to enjoy your summer and go on vacations and stuff. I'm tired of this real world stuff...can I be 10 again? Oh well, i will just stay here and work and make money. I guess someone has to do it, right? :)

"It's a Small World Afterall"

2005-06-06T21:57:00.000-05:00

Ok so i'm convinced now that it really is a small world...

David has been telling me his friend Katie who he went to school with who now attends FSU and worked at Publix with John. I asked John tonight did he know her and, after much thought and wavering :), we decided that, yes, he does know her. He knew that she had a connection with CCS (Community Christian School, where we went to elementary school) and when I realized her fiancee's last name was Hughes, I figured out that his mom was our chapel teacher at CCS and a good friend of Mrs. Linda. Ok so i know all this is very confusing, but basically, David's good friend from highschool, who worked with John until recently, is marrying one of our old teacher's sons. Man, thats crazy.

Time

2005-06-04T21:40:00.000-05:00

So, i don't so much think i'm ready for the real world. This whole getting up early, going to bed "early", no time for blogging thing is no good ;) Other than that, things are going well. I've now moved on to 1987...the progress is slow but steady. Its weird to drive around town and notice buildings that Sperry built 20 years ago. People look at me funny when i point them out, but thats ok :)

It was nice to have a short week this week. Monday off was awesome....it was a good end to a great weekend :) 4 days instead of 5 makes such a big difference. I vote for moving to a 4 day work/school week every week. If i ever have a position of any kind of power, that will be my first item of business.

We drove to Atlanta yesterday just for the night. Some of the kids went back with my aunt last week so we met her at my grandparent's house to get everyone back. It was good to see Susie and Daddy Jack. I hadn't been up there since Thanksgiving and i missed them when they came down so they were happy to see me too. It was a quick trip...and the drive home with 5 people in the saturn was kinda rough...but it was good to get away for a day.

So, the weekend is quickly coming to an end. I will do my best tomorrow to be lazy and enjoy peace and quiet but that doesn't usually happen so we'll see :)

rat poop

2005-05-24T20:22:00.000-05:00

So, the last two days at work can be summed up by those two nasty words. In order to move, all the files from the last 30 years have to be sorted through and most of the contents thrown away. I've been doing that little by little with the job files as I scan them from every year. Those files, tho haven't been bad...not too dirty just old. Well, along with the job files in the attic upstairs, there are (or were at this point) are accounting files from before the earth's crust hardened. So, we decided last week that 4 of us would go up there Monday and try to get it taken care of. Well, these files were nasty. Most of the stuff could be thrown away but we still had to open the boxes, most of which have obviously been rat homes for a number of years. There was rat poop everywhere...we were just waiting to see an actual rat in one of the boxes. Fortunately that didn't happen although we did see some in the trashcans. Man...so gross. Because they were accounting files, most of them needed to be kept confidential and thus couldn't be thrown away in the normal dumpster so we had to have shred-it dumpsters so it can be taken care of appropriately. Anyway, we were tossing paper off the railing upstairs into the dumpsters below so that was fun. I actually have pretty good aim :) So, in general, the last two days were just gross. We finally finished the acct stuff today and then i finished the job files for '86 so i'll start scanning that stuff in the morning. 1986 was a big year in the history of Sperry and Associates if anyone cares :) anyway, it will be nice to be out of the hot nasty attic and back in the cool office. Is it Friday yet?

Uh oh...

2005-05-21T17:19:00.000-05:00

TCC is now on the facebook....they're moving on up! :)

it's been a long time...

2005-05-20T22:44:00.000-05:00

So I figured since its Friday night and i'm too tired to do anything fun and i'm just sitting here at my computer, I might as well update my blog. Plus, David told me I should, so here ya go :)

Today was the end of three weeks of work. It's still going well...i'm not quite used to getting up at 6 every day, but I guess i'll get there. I'm always tired and afraid of turning into an old person. My days of staying up till 4 are over, at least till August ;) It's all good tho...the money is nice and it's good to have something to do. I finished all the jobs from 1985 today so thats good! Just 20 years to go in the next two months...oh the things I have to look forward to :) I've pretty much decided I don't want to work in an office for the rest of my life. I don't know yet what I want to do, but I know now what I don't want to do. Most of the guys who work in the office went to UF and they're trying to convince me to switch to the building construction program. LOL...me in construction? that's pretty funny :) Hey, they're making some good money tho so maybe it's something to think about.

What else has been going on recently? hmmm well it feels like there's always something going on around here. Baseball games and ballet recitals and driving kids to work...there aren't a lot of boring days in our family. it's fun tho...i'm enjoying being home. Today me and my dad went car shopping. Oh man...my dad takes forever when he's looking at cars. I know this, because he does it quite often for himself and I usually go with him, but for real. We spent like 7 hours going to most of the lots in town. Ok, so thats a slight exaggeration, but we did go to a lot. omg there was this one guy who was the typical used car salesman. He had the crazy hair that you hope is a toupe (or however you spell that) but are afraid it's real, ya know? And he talked forever. I mean he and my dad got going and I thought I was never gonna get out of there...man it was bad. I survived tho and hopefully I will soon have a car.

I don't have any big plans for the weekend. Sleep is definitely at the top of my list and maybe some time in the pool but other than that, just hanging out. Next week is gonna be crazy...my aunt karen and her kids are coming down from wednesday till saturday i think. Then David's coming friday for the weekend...oh yeah, next weekend is a long weekend that's happy :)...and then saturday is graduations but I think the only one i'm going to is rickards. anyway so yea, the crazy life of my family continues and i'll try to do better at keeping y'all posted :)

one week down...

2005-05-07T23:04:00.000-05:00

So my first week of work is over. It was a really good week other than getting up at 6 every day...i seriously had not been up that early in at least a year. I also went to bed at a decent hour every night. Getting into a schedule hasn't been as hard as i thought it would be and working was good. I didn't do a lot this week other than working...Friday I only work half a day so I went to lunch and a movie with Bubba and then to Kenley's for dinner and games and stuff. btw...Kenley, Joe, Diane, and I rock at Taboo :) It was good to hang out with everyone. Then today, I slept...finally! :) Then Tam and I went mothers day shopping and then I had dinner with Karina and Tasha...its good to see everyone again. I then came home and did some stuff for my mom and now that i've been awake for 12 hours I think its time to sleep again :) The weekend and opportunity to sleep will soon end...

A sad day...

2005-04-24T21:02:00.000-05:00

Reasons why today was a sad day:

1) The walls in our room are completely bare...no more pictures of my family and friends, no more Johnny Depp, not even a clock. It looks and feels kinda like a prison...or just a guy's room ;) (good analogy, David :)) Either way, its no good.

2) Lots of people were leaving today. It's happy for them I guess that they're done, but still, seeing people leave made me sad.

3) Alex's parents came and took most of her stuff.

4) My stuff is all in suitcases and boxes...it's hitting home that we're actually leaving.

5) We no longer have a TV and my stereo is packed...my sole source of entertainment is now the internet. I suppose the lack of electronics should be incentive to start studying for Wednesday's exam...heh we'll see :)

6) I'm extremely sleep deprived. Over the last two nights, i've slept a total of 6 hours. I've been taking naps, but its just not the same. It's currently 9:55 and i'm already sitting in bed. I have great intentions of going to bed "early", but we'll see how that works out.

So...today was a sad day.

Not all bad tho...I get to see my mom in 2 days and in 3 short days, it will be summer and I get to go home! (Although I have a feeling that 3 short days after that I will be ready to come back to my white walls and quiet room ;))

It's over...

2005-04-20T10:13:00.000-05:00

So spring 2005 classes ended today...wow! I can't believe my first year of college is two exams from being over. It's crazy how fast time flies. I remember back to this time last year, I was just deciding to come to UF, trying to finish the semester at TCC and Godby, and doing all the crazy senior year stuff. It's amazing how much life has changed since then. Everything is different...but in a good way. I feel like I've learned and grown so much. God has taught me so much about himself, about life, about relationships. I'm thankful that he's allowing me to see the growth that he's worked in me this year. It's crazy to think that this isn't even where I wanted to be. He has made it clear to me that UF is where he wants me and that's so awesome. I was disappointed and frustrated when my plans for me didn't work out, but i'm glad they didn't because now I see, yet again, that God's plans really are always best. Check out this verse from Psalm 25:

"Show me the path where I should walk, O Lord; point out the right road for me to follow. Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you." Psalm 25:4-5

A major thing I've learned this year is that I can have confidence in God's plan...that he will show me what's best and that I can trust him to work out everything for good in my life. I know I will struggle with this over and over again, thinking that I know what is best, when I definitely dont! But I know I can come back to the truths God has taught me about himself and myself this year and he will always patiently wait for me to realize how stupid I am and come back to trusting him. :)

As far as finishing out the school year...I have an exam Saturday (at 7:30 am...who does that?!? further evidence that the university of florida's scheduling system is NO GOOD!) and then Wednesday. My mom is coming down Tuesday to help me get my room packed and cleaned out...i can't wait to see my mom but the cleaning out and packing process is not something i'm looking forward to. I have so much more stuff than i came with in august...:( Then after my exam Wednesday afternoon, we will head back to tally where I will be all summer. I start work the following monday, may 2, which i'm excited about and ready to get started. ITS ALMOST SUMMER! :)

Dorm living...

2005-04-12T23:00:00.000-05:00

So this morning Alex and I were reminded of one of the joys of dorm living as we were awakened to a man knocking loudly on our door and yelling, "Maintenance...AC filters." I groggily looked at Alex and tried to say "come in" loud enough so he could hear me. Thats not so easy tho when you've just been woken up. And not that it would've mattered if he heard me say it anyway cause he was coming in regardless. They were really nice about it and I guess its a good thing that we now have new filters in our AC vents so we're not breathing all kinds of nasty stuff it was just a little awkward waking up to an old man coming in our room, ya know? :) I guess I should be used to it by now tho...its been 8 months and this is definitely not the most awkward situation i've encountered. (I think the weird cleaning man being in the hallway when i come from the shower in a towel wins.) So I suppose that the lesson to be learned from this is that with communal living, theres a certain degree of modesty that is thrown out the window. Oh well...i'll just avoid the custodial staff and hope for the best :)

BTW it was 11 AM when this happened so its not like it was early or anything. And I was supposed to be in class at the time so i guess I shouldn't complain...;)

Thanks

2005-04-11T15:07:00.000-05:00

Some things I'm feeling thankful for today...
an awesome time with God this morning, beautiful weather, a swimming pool right outside my dorm :), good books by Max Lucado, my parents, new friends, old friends, the fact that i'll be home for the summer 17 short days from now, the fact that classes will be over next week, the fact that I have no tests or papers this week, a weekend full of fun and good times, keeping in touch with old friends, the Jeremy Camp worship CD that Tamara gave me for Christmas, the fact that I have everything I need in Christ, my awesome roommate :), my bed (which i'll be visiting soon :)), days when you can just wear gym shorts and a t-shirt all day, one class on mondays, Bubba and Tracey, a job for the summer, finishing homework for wednesday today...
Thanks God for all your blessings and for giving me these things to enjoy! :)

Nav Conference

2005-04-11T00:21:00.000-05:00

This weekend, I went with some friends to a Nav conference in Tampa at USF. It was a full weekend and I came home exhausted but it was really good and lots of fun. We headed down Friday night and spent the night at Kate and Lexi's house...we had a fun girls' night with pizza and a movie and just hanging out :) The conference was all day Saturday so we got up early and headed to USF. Jerry Bridges...the author of The Pursuit of Holiness was the speaker and he was awesome. He had so many good things to say and some really deep stuff, so I took a lot of notes and I have a lot to sort through and think about. Kate and I ate lunch with him and were able to ask some good questions. It was awesome. Also, we got the book Growing Your Faith and i'm excited to read it. He just has so much amazing stuff to say. Anyways, there were people there from all the FL campuses so we got to see friends from FSU which was fun. I talked to several people who will be in Tallahassee all summer so I'm excited about being able to hang out with them. Then, after the conference, we headed to the beach :) We got dinner at an awesome Thai place and ate dinner on the beach watching the sun set. It was so beautiful. Then we just headed back to the Truesdale's house and Kate and I watched Beauty and the Beast which just might be the best movie ever. We got up early and came back this morning and although I was soooo tired, it was an awesome weekend and i'm really excited about the things God taught me.
On a different note...only a week and a half of classes left! I'm so ready...this week shouldn't be bad. I don't have anything really due till next week, but next week will be crazy, so I need to be productive this week so I don't stress myself out. I just keep doing things with the mindset that it's almost over. That's helping me hang in there. Hopefully I can make it 9 more days....

GO HEELS!

2005-04-05T12:58:00.000-05:00

The University of North Carolina Tarheels won the 2005 NCAA championship game against Illinois last night. I picked them to win in my bracket and they did...I'm good! ;) I also get 3 extra credit points on my western civ test for picking the winner...awesome! Everyone sing with me....
"I'm Tarheel born
and i'm Tarheel bred.
And when I die,
I'll be Tarheel dead.
So, raa raa Carolina-lina,
raa raa Carolina-lina,
raa raa Carolina-lina,
RAA RAA RAA!"
(Thats the fight song for those of you who don't know ;))

Summer musings...

2005-03-25T00:58:00.000-05:00

As the summer gets closer and closer I have been thinking a lot about how different it will be to be back at home for four months. It's sometimes hard to adjust back to family life for a weekend, so I know that the whole summer will present challenges we have yet to face. That's not really what i've been worried about, tho. The most recent time I have spent with my family has been lots of fun and I definitely see that God has been teaching me to apprecite them so much more. I'm miss them and while I know the summer won't be all fun and happy times, I'm excited about being at home. When we were in Orlando this week I was hugging my dad and told him i've been missing him. He laughed and said, "what do you want?" :) I guess he misses me too, huh? ;)

Something I have been a little more apprehensive about tho is where I fit in otherwise. I mean, i've been gone now like 8 months and obviously life can't be the same as it was before I left. While I still have all my awesome friends, relationships that have been long distance for that long won't be the same. I've already seen so many changes in and distance from what used to be some of my closest relationships and so it might even feel weird at times to be with some of those people. This is no one's fault...it's just part of being away and moving on. Also, i'm not sure where God wants me to be involved. I mean I feel like I need and want to have a ministry in the church but only being home for a few months makes that kinda weird. I mean Northwoods is still my home church, but it's different. Ahhh i just don't know. I'm confident that God will work everything out and I'm trusting him for that. I'm praying for his guidance and direction and expectantly waiting for him to reveal his will and his peace to me :)

Psalm 19:1-2

2005-03-20T13:53:00.000-05:00

"The heavens tell the glory of God. The skies display his marvelous craftsmanship. Day after day they continue to speak; night after night they make him known."

This verse is on my heart today because it's a beautiful day! God knew it was the first day of Spring and planned the weather accordingly I guess :) It's amazing how God uses things like the weather to bless us....the sunshine is putting me in a great mood. All week was kinda "blah" because I had so much to do and the weather was gross...no good. Having a good attitude when it's raining and dark all day isn't so easy. But today I feel awesome. It was good to worship with other believers this morning and now to be able to enjoy this amazing weather. Thanks, God, for letting us enjoy the beauty of your creation and for revealing your beauty through it.

So, it's been a pretty good weekend. Friday night I went to dinner with Ashley and David and that was fun. Then me and Ashley did some laundry and just hung out for awhile. Oh yeah, we made a Krispy Kreme run too...that was fun :) I went to bed late and then had to get up at 8 to go to work. It was alright tho cause work went by really fast and then I came back and slept all afternoon. Then I woke up and watched Legally Blond which is always fun :) (my dad called when I was watching it and he said, "you're hard up for something to watch, huh?"...some guys don't have a great enough appreciation for chick flicks ;) it's ok tho I love him anyway) Then after that Runaway Bride came on so of course I had to watch that too :) I did a little bit of homework, but my plans for a productive night didn't work out so well. Oh well :) Then this morning we went to church which was good. I like hanging out with Claire and Emily...they're fun :) Pastor Pendley was speaking about God's work in us and through us using an example of Peter in Acts 9....good stuff. This afternoon we're having a spring tea :) One of the Nav staff here, Deb, wanted to have a tea to celebrate spring and to reflect some as Easter approaches. She's awesome and i'm sure it will be a great time....i'm excited :)

So three of my NCAA teams are still winning :) On my western civ test Tuesday, the prof told us to pick four teams we thought would make it to the final four and the team we thought would win it all and for each team we picked correctly we would get extra points for our test (of course if we picked UF and they won, we would get even more points ;)). So three of the teams I picked are still in...UNC (duh), Duke, and GA Tech. The other bracket...the Chicago one...i didn't really have a choice so thats ok. I don't even remember who I chose there. So the UNC game is starting in 20 minutes! I wish I was at home to watch it with my dad but I can cheer from here...GO HEELS! :) I've never cheered for Duke (the "dukies" in our house :)) but extra points would be nice, so i'll cheer for them as long as they're not playing the Tarheels I guess. I'm excited to see what happens :)

Alrighty, i'm gonna get back to enjoying this awesome day and some quality basketball :)

Midterm

2005-03-16T19:48:00.000-05:00

Ok, so technically, it's past "midterm" but this was the week (actually the two days) of midterms for me. Ugh...i'm just glad they're all over. I felt pretty good about them for the most part tho. I had a literature midterm on Monday morning and I was a little scared about it cause it's the only test we have in that class and it was all essays. I got an A on it tho (I found out when I went to class today) so that's a big relief. Then yesterday afternoon I had a western civ test...also essays and short answer...but I felt good about it too. I did well on the first test so I'm not to worried about it. Then last night was stats. A little scary...I never know how to feel about those tests. I did alright on the first one tho so i'm hoping for the best. Either way, they're over! No more tests for two weeks so that's happy. Today I just enjoyed being done with everything and slept most of the day :)

Some happy news I found out yesterday...I have a job for the summer! My dad called yesterday afternoon and told me that Bubba talked to him boss and Sperry needs some extra office help over the summer and I can have the job. I need to call the office tomorrow and get some stuff finalized, but God is so good to provide that. It's full time and good pay so that's happy too. I'm so thankful to have friends like Bubba who look out for me and a God who knows and provides exactly what I need! :)

The rest of the week is pretty slack. I have classes tomorrow and then one friday and that's it. I'm working Saturday morning and afternoon but other than that I don't have any plans. I'm gonna start studying I think and work on a paper that I have due in a couple weeks so I can enjoy Easter weekend at home and not get behind. I get to go with my family to Orlando Monday night so that's fun. John's team always travels for a baseball tournament during spring break and this year they're going to Orlando. My parents decided to come down Monday and stay monday night so we can catch monday and tuesday's games so that should be fun. It'll be good to get away for a couple of days and hang out with my family. Hopefully get some sun too :)

Today is the 5 weeks mark...exactly 5 weeks from today is the last day of classes YAY! :) Exams are after that (i'll be all done 6 weeks from today) but still 5 weeks sounds better :) I can't believe my first year is almost over. It goes by so fast! I wanna make the most of these last couple of weeks and not miss anything God has for me. Exciting stuff! :)

Spring Break is over...

2005-03-06T01:38:00.000-05:00

Wow...I can't believe Spring break is already over. I have mixed emotions about this fact. On one hand, I'm sad to leave home and to have to get back into the swing of studying and school. On the other hand, however, I'm ready to get back into a routine and just get done...i'm pretty sure we only have 6 more weeks of school! That's so exciting. 4 months of summer is going to be awesome :) Anyways, my spring break wasn't so exciting. I didn't do a whole lot, but it was good to just hang out and be with family and friends and to SLEEP! Here's a little bit about what went on.

So last weekend, the Navs from all the FL schools...that's UF, FSU, UCF, and USF...were in Tally to spend some time praying at FSU and just hanging out together. So, we had dinner together Friday night and then Kate spent the night with me. It's always funny to see how people not used to a big family respond to being here, but she seemed to enjoy it even tho it was crazy :) Then we got up early Saturday morning and, after a yummy breakfast at chick-fil-a, went to FSU and prayer walked at campus for a little while. Then we all had lunch together at Moes. It was a good time of hanging out and meeting people from other schools and prayer walking is a really cool experience. Then I went to Godby for John's game. It's weird to go back there...it feels like so long ago when I was a student. Anyway, they won and it was fun to get to watch him play and see people from high school. Then Saturday night, I got to spend time with my favorite little people, Grace, Emma and Taylor(who isn't so little :)). Being with them when i'm home reminds me how much I miss them and being with kids in general. They're so sweet and I love them. Then I spent some time talking to Sharyn and Lance...it's always good to catch up with them. I miss them too...not just their kids :) Sunday was a normal day. Dad and I went to Unveiled Sunday night and that was good. It's cool to see the work that's going on on campus here. Then I went to dinner with my dad so that was fun. We had a good time hanging out. It was a fun but tiring weekend since I still hadn't caught up from staying up all thursday night!

Well, Monday "morning" I caught up :) After I finally woke up, Tamara and I made a cake for Karina's birthday which was lots of fun. We surprised her later that night so that was good. I think she had a good birthday so that's happy. I love birthdays and hope we helped make hers special. Also Monday night we had a pretty huge family conversation which was hard but good. Then, I went to the Stringers' and Tam and I watched The Wedding Planner....best movie EVER! It's so good...we had to watch it for old times sake :) We were having withdrawls because it had been so long! Tuesday was nothing too exciting. John and Grace had games and then we had dinner with Bubba and Tracey. I was glad that I got to hang out with them and dinner at Longhorn is always yummy :) Wednesday I spent some time with the little girls which was fun. I picked up Ellen and Sus from school and we went to the mall to have some "girl time" :) It makes me sad because I feel a little like i'm missing out on their growing up so I wanna make the most of being with them when I can. Then Grace had another game and we went to church. Spending time just praying was good...I need to do that more often. Then Wednesday night after church (and everything else that could possibly go on ;)) I went to dinner with David, Shannon, Calyn, Jesse, Seth, Kevin, and Alex (for a little while). It was a lot of fun to hang out and catch up with everyone. I was glad we made time to do that...I miss them all and it's good to know what's going on in everyone's lives. Then Thursday I woke up at early, at noon, and we headed to Panama City for the weekend. My parents and the little girls and I went down to watch John's baseball tournament. We stayed at a friend's house and had lots of fun. John's team won both games...Go Cougars! We just hung out at the house, ate, slept, and watched baseball. Good stuff! :) We got back late last night, and thus is my spring break. I guess it sounds pretty boring, but I enjoyed it. Being at home was nice and I feel rested (kind of) and ready to get back and finish school. What could've been better? Well, warm weather and a tan would be nice but it'll all come in due time :)

All-nighter

2005-02-25T08:31:00.000-05:00

Well, it's 8:30 friday morning and i've now been awake for I think 21 hours. Yep, I woke up at noon yesterday and haven't slept since then. It's been awhile since I pulled an all-nighter and I think it's the first ever for school purposes. The paper that's due in an hour got finished around 7 ;) It's amazing what we can do when we have the right motivation. Knowing that after this class is over, I have 10 days of freedom kept me writing through the night. So right now I feel tired, but i'm so excited that i'm actually ready to go to class :) No doubt I'll come back and crash since we're not heading home till like 5 but it's such a good feeling to be done with everything. Whew! For all of you who are still a couple of weeks away, hang in there!

I'm excited about going home and having no plans for a week. Usually I'm a very structured person and I like to have things planned out and know what's going on but a week of just relaxing and sleeping and hanging out is sounding awesome. God is a God of rest and peace and I'm asking him to give me some of that this week. I'm also a little anxious b/c it's been two months since I spent extended time at home and it's sometimes hard to get back into the family swing of things but it's all good :)

by the way, whoever thought of spring break is awesome!

Life Plans

2005-02-23T15:31:00.000-05:00

So I was going to Gap's website earlier today and on their homepage was an advertisement for new babygap nursery decor. It was so adorable (as all of their stuff is, especially babygap) and made me think about having a baby. NOT RIGHT NOW for all of you who just freaked out :) It just got me thinking about life plans and goals that I have and stuff. Then a little while later, I was having my quiet time...we've been reading some in Psalms...and I got to this verse in Psalm 20..."May he grant your heart's desire and fulfill all your plans." (Psalm 20:4) I was reminded that God has by best at heart and that all good things in my life will happen in his timing and in his way. I'm resting in his plan for me.

This week is going well...it's just taking forever. My exams yesterday went ok. I'm just so glad they're over. Now, all that's between me and spring break is a paper which I haven't even started ;) That's due Friday morning...i have plenty of time...and then i'll be done! I can't wait!

Oh, just a side note...I'm sitting here eating Famous Amos cookies and just happened to look at the nutrition facts. I normally don't do this and it was kind of an accident this time but I noticed that the serving size is 4 cookies. Ok now, realistically, has anyone ever just eaten four of those cookies? Anyways, I just thought that was interesting...I'm gonna go finish my third (or more) serving :)

It's almost SPRING BREAK...

2005-02-21T02:19:00.000-05:00

Those words have to mark the longest week of school besides the week before summer break starts. It's only 5 more days but I have so much to do in those days...I just want it to be Friday! Spring break is always a much needed...break! I guess that's the point. So at this point, all that's standing in the way of me and spring break are two psych tests and a lit paper. Not so bad, right? Well, if I had started on them before 2 AM monday morning, then maybe not :) It's all good tho...I might not so much sleep this week, but all I have to do is make it till Friday and then I have 10 whole days of freedom-sleeping, laying out, going to the beach, hanging out with friends. That is my motivation...and it's pretty good motivation if you ask me! :) For all of you who don't have spring break for another week or two (or month i guess for that matter)...sad for you but not so sad that I won't enjoy my own break ;) Only 5 more days.....

I had a great weekend at home. Went to my first FSU baseball game so that was fun...kinda ironic that I never went to a game till now that I attend the rival university, tho :) It was a fun time tho with good company :) Other than that I pretty much hung out at home and enjoyed my family so it was a nice relaxing weekend. The crazy baseball season has started at home so I'm looking forward to being a part of that next week when i'm home. Other than that, same old same old for 5 more days...then SPRING BREAK!

Fun Times

2005-02-15T01:40:00.000-05:00

Happy Valentine's Day! It was an awesome day, but more about that later....

So, on Thursday, I gave a little preview to my weekend, but it was so great that I want to tell you all about it.

Friday night we went to a swing dance and it was so much fun. My friend Kristin has done that before so she knew about it and invited us. Kate, the other Kristin, and I went with her and had a blast. Kate and I decided belly dancing has given us confidence because, as most of you probably know, I haven't been much of a dancer before now ;) After the dance, I came back and made cookies and watched Moulin Rouge with Ashley. It's a really cool movie...I definitely recommend it. So by then, it was 3 and then Alex came home. Her side of the room was a mess and her parents were coming Saturday morning, so she decided to clean. Well of course Ashley and I had to keep her company, so we went to bed around 5. That's becoming pretty normal...

Saturday I slept till like 2, when Alex came back from spending the morning with her parents. I just hung around and then around 5 went across campus to a cookout some of the Nav guys were having. They are awesome cooks (more on that to follow) and that was lots of fun. Then, David Roan called because he was in town and was going to see a friend's band play and he invited me to go with him. So, I spent the night with David and his friends and had a great time. I went to bed around 5 again....

Sunday morning I woke up at 8 (was very tired hence the 3 hours of sleep) but so excited because we were going to the beach. Kate, Claire, Erin, and I spent the day at St. Augustine. It was beautiful! It was a little chilly but we had a great time...I love the beach! Then we came back and had dinner and made Valentine's Day cookies. Of course when I came back last night, I was exhausted but had done no homework all weekend, so I was up till 4 yet again. It's ok tho...it was all worth it! Even with the lack of sleep, it was an awesome weekend.

Ok so back to today. I know that feelings about Valentine's Day are very mixed, but I like it. I like that there's a day to celebrate love; I don't, however, think this is the only day all year when we should do so. It is fun to have a day devoted to it tho I think. My dad is my valentine again, for 19 years running....I suppose that will change one day, but i'm perfectly happy with that for now :) Tonight, tho was very cool. A group of the Nav guys made dinner for all the girls...it was amazing. They went all out with decorations, a three course meal, live music, everything. We got to dress up and they served us all night. It was so much fun and it was a neat picture of the way God showed his love to us--by giving of himself and serving others. I felt honored and loved today, as I hope all of you did too. The awesome truth is tho, that whether we feel it or not, we are loved, with an unfailing love, every day. Wow...what's not to celebrate about Love?

This Week

2005-02-10T23:53:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't been doing a very good job keeping up with my blog, so I thought I would give a little update on this week and what's been going on....

It's been pretty long. I had two more tests this week but thankfully that's the last of them for the next couple of weeks. I've had four in the last 3 weeks so I'm glad to have a break for awhile. I think if I studied more along the way, tests wouldn't be such a big deal, but being that I don't study till the night before, it makes for some long nights. I think the earliest I went to bed this week was 1 AM with the latest being after 4. They went well for the most part tho. I will do my best to enjoy more of a free week next week and try to stay up on studying...we'll see how that goes ;)

I didn't do so well with going to the gym this week :( Having night tests doesn't help. I did go to bellydancing this week again tho so that was fun. I've had several requests for demonstrations of what i'm learning, but I'm pretty sure that what happens in that class needs to stay there. Believe me...you're not missing much (except a good laugh) ;)

Our Biblestudy this semester is going well. Last semester we were just studying the Bible with not real focused study. That was very refreshing and encouraging b/c sometimes it's good to just get in the Word with other believers. This semester tho, we're doing a study on identity. It has been good...we've been talking about our identity in Christ and the roles we play. It's very cool because all of us are in different places in our walks so I love how everyone sees things differently. I grew up always being with people similar to me in background, faith, family, etc. I've really enjoyed developing relationships with people in different places and seeing the awesome things that God is doing in everyone's lives, no matter where we're at.

This weekend promises to be full of fun :) Tomorrow I'm going with some friends to a swing dance so that'll be fun. Then Sunday, we're heading to the beach! I can't wait...St. Augustine is so beautiful and it'll be good to enjoy the beach for the first time this year. One good thing about being in central FL is that it's warmer :) While not a lot, it definitely makes a difference so we're taking advantage of it.

I've really been missing my parents this week. It's been 6 weeks since I came back and I've never gone this long ever without seeing them. Dad's birthday was today so that was a little bit sad to miss. But spring break is only two weeks away...how awesome is that?!? Other than the fact that spring break is in February, i'm very excited :)

Alrighty, that's about it. Life is good and I'm loving it down here. God is doing some very cool things in my life and I'm excited about the growth that he's letting me see. While life is certainly not problem free, I'm taking comfort in the fact that it's nothing He can't handle. Wow, that's an amazing fact. Be encouraged by that!

Ironic

2005-02-03T17:14:00.000-05:00

Ok so my last blog was about losing touch with people and how it's sad to grow apart from people you used to be close to. Well, since then, God has been reminding me how cool it is to stay in touch with people and what a blessing that can be. There have been several incidents of this in my life this week...

First of all, the Facebook is awesome. For those of you who don't know about the facebook, it's hard to explain, but basically it's a way to find people at your school and also to stay in touch with friends who go to other schools, being that most colleges and universities have access to it. Well, because of the facebook, I've been in touch with this guy from highschool. He left before our senior year and I hadn't seen him until I was home at Christmas and then we ran into eachother. Anyway, so we've been keeping in touch and it's cool to see what's going on in his life and to catch up on the last year and college stuff.

Then, I had two friends call me this week...calls that I would consider a little bit random. One was a friend I probably hadn't talked to in 8 months or so and it was really good to talk to him and to know what's going on in his life. He seems to be doing really well and that's a blessing. Another was a good friend, who I've talked to some since I've been gone and hung out with when i'm at home and stuff, but it's cool when you're not expecting a call and then you talk for a long time just about life stuff.

Anyway, I just thought it was a little ironic that right after I blogged about losing touch with people, God provided opportunities for me to catch up with old friends and it's been a big blessing this week. I still think it's a natural thing to grow and move on from the past, but that doesn't have to mean leaving behind people that you value and care about. I need to pursue people and not give up on friendships...afterall, where would we be if God related to us that way?

Friends

2005-01-30T22:29:00.000-05:00

Having friends is such an awesome thing. Having gone away to college, I've become aware of how easy it is to fall out of touch with people that you considered "good friends". It's sad that it happens, but I guess that it's just part of growing and moving on. It's so encouraging tho that no matter the distance and different places you go, there are some friends that you will always have and that you will always cherish. They're like family...no matter how long it's been, you are comfortable with them and feel like you haven't been apart at all. Tamara came down to spend this weekend with me and we had an awesome time. Our friendship is like that...we get together and it's like we were never apart. It was just really good to see her and to talk about what's going on in our lives. We were talking about friendships and how they change over the years like when you get married and have kids, you don't have much time for friendships but you value what you had and you always remember special friends no matter how much time you get to spend with them. I pray that as I get older and move to different places in my life, I will always value my friends and let them know how much they mean to me.

Stuff

2005-01-26T15:27:00.000-05:00

I feel like I have so much stuff to do. The "time of first tests" has come...earlier this semester than the last one. I swear college professors get together and plan their syllabuses (not the right word, I know :)) with everything at the same time in order to make students crazy. It feels like no matter how much I "catch up" I'm still behind. Dirty dishes and clothes are piled up in my room (in a neat mess, of course ;)) The readings I need to get done are piling up on top of eachother. Even the good activities like going to the gym and having dinner with friends aren't always enjoyable because I'm thinking of all the other things I need to get done. As I consider all that's going on right now, God reminds me to just take a little time to rest. Spend time with him. Don't let my quiet time be another thing on my list of "to do's". Because when I take a few minutes out to just be still and get my focus back, he will give me the peace and strength I need to get everything else done. I confess, I sometimes have to force myself to stop and be still. It doesn't come naturally to sit and "refuel" or to ask for help. But if I don't, I will just continue to feel overwhelmed and like I'm going nowhere. Also, I need to be diligent when I'm working but also to take time to relax and enjoy the other activities I'm involved in. I want to give myself fully to everything I do so I just have to find a good balance between work and play, and I'm asking God to help me with that.

Just on a note about what's going on specifically...
I've been better about going to the gym this week. I'm going to a belly dancing class this afternoon...I'm sure that it will be as funny, if not more, than the mental picture all of you are getting of me belly dancing :) I've just been studying a lot and volunteering at the daycare on campus for my developmental psych class. That's been fun...I didn't realize how much I missed hanging out with little kids. Our new Biblestudy that we're doing seems good. We're only a week into it but I'm enjoying it so far and we're working on scripture memory this semester so it's awesome to get back to doing that consistently. Tamara's coming Friday to spend the weekend with me, so i'm excited! :) Ok, well I'm gonna go wash these dirty dishes and try to restore some order to my room before I head out to belly dancing and then a night of studying.

Being Real

2005-01-22T23:00:00.000-05:00

I know my last post had a little bit about what God has been teaching me about being real, but I wanted to share a little more about that....

Like I said before, the reason I usually don't share what's going on in my life is because it's not easy or convenient. But there's another reason that sharing my sins and struggles is so hard and that's because it makes me vulnerable. A lot of what I do is driven by a desire to please people and by a desire to not disappoint or let anyone down. This isn't a good thing and is something God is trying to help me get over. I mean, pleasing people isn't always a bad thing, but I definitely shouldn't let it be motivation to do or not do things. I am challenged by what Paul says in Galatians 1:10, "Obviously, I'm not trying to be a people pleaser! No, I am trying to please God. If I were still trying to please people, I would not be Christ's servant." This means that living to please people and living to please God don't go together--I have to choose. It's a constant struggle and requires a daily decision, but I'm trying to live in a way that pleases God. Anyway, so a lot of the time, I hesitate telling people about what's going on in my life because I think they won't approve or that I will disappoint them. And sometimes this will be the case. We're human and when people tell us wrong things in their lives, to judge is our first instinct. But God commands us to share our sins with eachother, so we must make ourselves vulnerable to judgment and even rejection at times. That's not an easy thing to do. James 5:16 says, "Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed." So if we want to get better, confession is a must. I saw a cool example of this principle in my life over Christmas. I shared some things with my parents that had been going on in my life...mostly things while I was still home that I had never told them. I hadn't told them the truth about these things because I was afraid that they would be disappointed in me because "it wasn't like me" or something. So, it finally all came out and, although my parents were upset that I hadn't told them the truth from the beginning, they were just glad for me to tell them what was going on and then help me with those things. We prayed and talked for a long time and now, with their help and direction, I feel like I'm making progress in that area of my life. So, God showed me on a very personal level how the confess and be healed stuff works. It wasn't easy, but it has paid way off! So I just want to encourage us, and myself most importantly, to be real with each other. Let's get to know each other on a deeper level and trust each other. Let's make ourselves vulnerable so that we can grow together.

Weekend Update

2005-01-18T00:43:00.000-05:00

Ok, so this definitely won't be as funny as SNL's "weekend update"...sorry, guys, if you got your hopes up ;) Long weekends are awesome! I did my best to enjoy it, being that it's the only day off we get this semester, other than spring break. :( I didn't actually do a lot, which was nice. I worked Saturday and Sunday which was same old, same old. I went to the gym everyday so that was good. I'm 8 for 9 of the last days...yay for me! Last night I watched Napoleon Dynamite for the first time. I was a little slow watching it, I know, but it was definitely worth it. If you haven't seen it yet, it's an experience you should have at least once! :) The only thing that would've made it better is if there was a mullet...oh well I guess. I also watched "50 First Dates" and "Shallow Hal". We had a great movie weekend! Well, I thought I had more to say but I can't think of anything else right now, so I guess that's it. Since I didn't do any homework till tonight, I guess I should get back to it...tomorrow starts bright and early at 10:40 ;)

Some random thoughts

2005-01-17T02:12:00.000-05:00

It's been a few days since I last "blogged" so I'm just gonna share some random things I've been thinking through this weekend...

On Thursday night at our Biblestudy, we watched a video of a Nav Conference that John Lynch was speaking at--the name of the message was "Truefaced". It was a really good message about being accepted because of Christ and not having to work to keep or prove our salvation. He talked about how so often we put on a mask and try to look like we have it all together. We think if we just work a little harder or perform a little better, we can earn God's love or God will love us just a little bit more. Also, we wear that mask with eachother so that no one knows what's really going on and the people around us think we're doing great, when in reality we're falling apart. I think there are a few reasons we do this.... First of all, we don't want others to think badly of us. Everyone else looks like they have everything figured out so we think it's not ok for us to be hurting and struggling. Also, we act like everything is fine because it's just easier. If someone asks how I am doing, it's so much easier to say, "fine" and go on than to stop and share what's on my heart. Finally, I think we wear masks because we don't recognize for ourselves what's going on in our lives. I know for myself, I get too busy or I just don't take time to slow down and notice things that God is trying to teach me or work on in my life. If I don't even know how i'm doing, then it's really hard to be honest with others about it, ya know? I think of these reasons, the reason that I most often don't share what's going on in my life is because of the convenience factor. I'd rather say, "fine" and be on my way. But this isn't how we're called to relate to eachother. We're called to be real with eachother and share our sins with eachother and only then will we be healed. So often in the church, I feel like we're very fake. We come to church every Sunday and see the same people and go through the same motions, but how much do we really know about eachother? Do we know specific ways to pray for eachother and the struggles that our friends are going through? I know that so many times in my own life I don't. And I'm just as guilty for not sharing my faults and needs with those closest to me. I'm challenging myself--and all of us who are believers--to be more real. And not just with Christians, but with non-christians, too. If we act pious and perfect all the time, what will non-christians be attracted to or relate to in us? This is something I'm gonna be working on.

Some cool verses I found (or i guess more like "rediscovered") in my quiet time Friday....
"Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinnes or join in with scoffers. But they delight in doing everything the Lord wants; day and night they think about his law. They are like treest planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season without fail. Their leaves never wither, and in all they do, they prosper. For the Lord watches over the path of the godly...." (Psalm 1:1-3, 6)
Wow, I want these verses to be true in my life. I feel like in my Spiritual life, I don't produce fruit "each season, without fail", but it's more like every couple of seasons. Instead of my "leaves never wither(ing)", they wither and then grow back. Instead of constant and continual growth, I feel like I go through dry and stagnant periods and then cycle back to growth. I know that a key to that is thinking about God's word day and night. That definitely isn't true about my life right now, but how much amazing growth would I see if I did that? I know that we aren't always able to measure growth on an earthly scale but when we look back, we see what God was doing. But I know that I would have so much more power and passion in my life if his Word was such a big part of my life. Day and night...that's all the time! Gosh, i'm working toward something like that, but it sure is tough.

Finally (for real, I promise :)), a few more QT verses i've been thinking about...
"Submit to God's royal son, or he will become angry, and you will be destroyed in the midst of your pursuits--for his anger can flare up in an instant. BUT what joy for all who find protection in him." (Psalm 2:12)
This verse shows a very accurate picture of the difference between believers and nonbelievers. Those who choose not to submit to Christ live in the fear and danger of the wrath of God. That must be a miserable place to live. I feel like I'm not sensitive enough to the reality of that. I'm praying that God will help me to understand on a deeper level the misery of those who don't know him and as a result of that, have more compassion for them and a passionate desire to see them come to Him. Those who choose Christ, however, live in joy because they are free and protected. As David says in the next chapter, "But you, O Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, and the one who lifts my head high." (Psalm 3:3)

Ok, so those are my weekend musings... I'm so thankful the weekend's not over yet! :)

Sorry...

2005-01-13T11:42:00.000-05:00

The website for "Undoing the Destruction of Pleasure" is www.desiringgod.org... Sorry for the wrong info :)

Pleasure is God's Purpose

2005-01-12T23:18:00.000-05:00

Last night at "Nav Night" (a biblestudy thing the Navs here do a couple of times a month) we listened to an intriguing message by John Piper called "Undoing the Destruction of Pleasure". I just wanted to share some of my thoughts about this thought-provoking message....

"God's purpose is to maximize my pleasure and to magnify Jesus Christ." This was the phrase that opened the message. When I first thought about this sentance, I wasn't so sure about it. I guess the word pleasure makes me think of "worldly things". But in looking at the Scripture, pleasure is indeed what God wants for us. In Psalm 16:11, David says, "You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever." And one of the fruits that we get as a result of God's spirit living in us is joy. (Galatians 5:22) The key to this pleasure, is that when we're living with God's spirit in us, we find pleasure in him and not in the things of the world and the things that we might consider pleasure.

Piper went on to talk about some things that stand in the way of this pleasure that God intends for us to experience. The basis of these problems is our sinfulness. The first thing that gets in the way of pleasure is God's wrath. This is a quote from the message that I thought was very cool: "God gets angry when he is shown to be small by our putting other things before him." God is holy and jealous and will not and cannot stand for things to be placed above him. Because he is just, he has to deal with that and our pleasure and fellowship in him are disrupted. A second thing that gets in the way of our pleasure in Christ is suffering. There are obviously things on this earth that are painful and while God doesn't cause them necessarily, he allows them and those things aren't always enjoyable for us. But because we are a fallen people living in a fallen world, suffering is inevitable. A third thing that robs us of pleasure is the deceitfulness of the false pleasures that we pursue. We go after things that we think will bring joy and pleasure, and while they may last for a season, they will not satisfy and we will realize that they only let us down. The end up robbing us from the true pleasure that God designed us to experience. Finally, death gets in the way of pleasure. For those of us who are in Christ, death only leads to eternal pleasure, but for those who will be separated from God, they will experience the extreme opposite of pleasure forever.

The good news? Christianity is designed to undo these destructions of pleasure!

How you might ask....

Well, first about the wrath of God. Jesus came as the sacrifice for our sin. Because God is just, there had to be a blood offering for our sin. We deserved that, but Jesus' perfect blood makes us right with God. Now when God looks at us, he sees Jesus' perfection and not our sin so his wrath has been removed because of what Christ did. Ok...so that makes sense but how does being a Christian help to undo the pain and destruction of suffering? This answer comes with a two tiered answer--the first in this life and the second in the life to come. While on earth, we can never be completely free of suffering, but we can move toward that by healing and by love. All of the medical advances that we have today work to relieve much of the suffering that we experience. And God, in his mighty power, sometimes takes it upon himself to heal us supernaturally. Also, we can help to overcome suffering by love. Another awesome quote from this message is, "God redeemed a people who would be passionate about good deeds." By showing love to those around us, we can help to heal hurts and pains. Life in Christ is about giving our lives away. It seems strange to find pleasure in giving up your life for someone else, but God promises that if we give it up, we will find it. That's hard to do, but it will pay off! Suffering will be ultimately overcome when there is a "new heaven and a new earth". We look forward excitedly to the day when Christ will return and there will be no more pain or tears.

Another interesting thought to consider...."The main demand in the Bible is to be happy in Christ. So many times I think of the Christian life as what I have given up and what I don't do but obviously, there's a lot more to it than that. God wants our pleasure and joy to be full...I don't know how much joy is full joy but God promises that we will find it in his presence! I don't know about you, but that's the kind of life I want to live.

Ok, so I know that my presentation of this isn't nearly as good as hearing Piper speak, but I hope that it means something to you. I would love it if you guys would let me know any thoughts you have on this topic. On that note...I will leave you with one last thought

"Sin is contemplating God as a fountain of infinite pleasure but saying, 'no thanks,' and finding 'pleasure' on our own."

I hope for you pleasure and full joy in Christ!

Oh, and if you wanna hear this message, I think you can go to www.desiringGod.com and download it as an MP3 file :)

Pleasurable pain

2005-01-10T22:48:00.000-05:00

...seems like an oxymoron, huh? I was pondering that phrase as I finished working out tonight. I did like 20 minutes of warm up on a stair step thing before a 45 minute step aerobics class (which was very intense) followed by 30 minutes of total body work out. It's now been three hours since I did all that and although I'm sore (and probably will be for awhile ;)), I feel great. The feeling following an awesome work out is amazing. It seems ironic tho to feel so great in the midst of the pain i'm experiencing, also the result of working out. Then I started thinking about the idea of pleasure in pain as it relates to God's working in my life. So many times, the work he is doing is painful to me and I don't always see the good in it. I tend to focus only on the pain it causes me. However, I can find pleasure in that pain because I know that God will use it for good in my life. And, like working out will make my body more fit, the painful experiences God allows in my life and in the lives of those close to me will result in a closer relationship with him and lots of growth. So, I'm trying to keep in sight the pleasure that comes as a result, both of my spiritual and physical pain.

Who am I?

2005-01-10T16:26:00.000-05:00

So I was having my quiet time this afternoon and I spent some time praying before I even opened my Bible. I was praying about a situation in particular and telling God that I didn't understand why he was allowing it but that I trusted his plan and his will to work out for good. A lot of times for me, that's an easy thing to say but not always so easy to believe. So then I was reading in John 3, just kind of randomly, and I got to the following passage:

"He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less. He has come from above and is greater than anyone else. I am of the earth, and my understanding is limited to the things of earth, but he has come from Heaven. He tells what he has seen and heard, but how few believe what he tells them! Those who believe him discover that God is true. For he is sent by God. He speaks God's words, for God's Spirit is upon him without measure or limit. The Father loves his Son, and he has given him authority over everything. And all who believe in God's son have eternal life. Those who don't obey God will never experience eternal life, but the wrath of God remains upon them." (John 3:30-36, NLT)

It was one of those times where you know God led you to what you're reading. Right after I told God that I trusted him in this situation, he reminded me that he is worthy of that trust. His understand and sight are so much greater and reach so much further than mine do. I am a mere human and I can't even see tomorrow, or the rest of today for that matter. God however, has awesome plans that he has promised will all work out for good. Although that's sometimes hard for me to see, I can take great comfort in the fact that he's in control and I don't have to be. My understanding is very limited but he sees it all and I can trust him that it's all good! :)

On my mind...

2005-01-09T23:12:00.000-05:00

Just some things that are on my mind and heart tonight...
Today was a good day. I went to church at Christ Community this morning which is a PCA church that some of the Navs go to. It was good...I dunno, tho, I just feel like it's gonna take a lot for me to feel at home in any church here. That's a little bit of a frustrating feeling. I like going to church with Kate and Claire tho and I know I can worship wherever I go. I have to remember that it's not about where I worship necessarily but Who and that we're really one big community of believers whether i'm at Northwoods where I'm comfortable or somewhere else.

I had a good lunch with Kate today. I'm so thankful for my new friends here. God blessed me with some awesome Christian girls here right away and that's awesome. We're starting a new Biblestudy on Thursday night and I'm excited about what God has for me in that.

I have to turn in some housing stuff for next year in the next couple of weeks so I've been praying about what God wants me to do about that. I feel like I'm definitely supposed to stay on campus. I've been talking to Kate and Claire about living on their floor. I've been thinking that would be awesome b/c it's so close to where I live right now and they're awesome, but I've just been asking God what he wants. So, last night I was talking to a girl on my floor and she was like, "yeah, we can live together". So, i'm not sure that i'm gonna live on the floor with Kate and Claire but I really feel like living with Ashley will be awesome and it's definitely a God thing. So, no matter where we end up living, I feel confident that being with Ashley is what God wants for me. It's so relaxing to know that he's working things out and that i'm in his will.

So starts another week down here in the swamp....:)

oh by the way...I went to the gym today. Hopefully it was the beginning of a new good habit!

Psych

2005-01-07T02:28:00.000-05:00

Class today was refreshing. When I decided last semester that I wanted to pursue psychology, I wasn't so sure how that would work out being at a liberal university like UF. I was afraid that I would be fed all kinds of crap. I decided today tho that it's all about perspective. In developmental psych, we were talking about....well the development of children ;) For real tho we were talking about the complexity of development and some amazing things that even babies are capable of, such as recognizing language and picking out their mother's voice. There's even evidence that babies have some capacity of learning while still in the womb. Then in cognitive psych we were talking about the complexity of the brain and the capacities that we have for things like memory and thinking. I was just amazed all over again at how wonderfully complex God has made us. How could people attribute such amazing things to anything other than God's awesome power? I was reminded of David's words, "You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous--and how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed."(Psalm 139:13-16) WOW! God knew what he was doing when he made each and every one of us. I'm so excited about discovering more about God's awesome work in the minds and hearts of his most precious creation--US!

"Sexy" major?

2005-01-06T00:08:00.000-05:00

Ok, so my netscape homepage has a caption that says something like this..."Most Common Major: The new "sexy" major". At least something close to that. Either way, it got my attention. I thought, "wow...maybe it's psychology" :) ok, so what do you think is the most sexy major? Come on, guess! If not psychology, I would guess something like one of the romance languages or literature or something. But no....it's ACCOUNTING. Oh my gosh...what in the heck is sexy about accounting? That's crazy if you ask me, but no one asked me so on that thought...i'm going to sleep :)

New Semester

2005-01-05T13:05:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I know I swore I had better things to do than to post a Blog, but I lied. I just thought maybe everyone was really interested in what's going on in my life so I thought I would keep you posted ;) So, yesterday marked the start of the end of my freshman year as a University of Florida Gator. I can't believe that one semester is already over...it flew by. I failed my first test, made my first "B"....lots of firsts last semester :) My time at home for Christmas was awesome. It was great to just stay at home and relax with my family. I was excited to come back and it's such a blessing to not dread coming to school. I really like it here and I have some goals for this semester and this year that I'm already working toward....
First of all, I need to really embrace the life that God has for me here. I stayed really connected to home last semester (everyone's thinking, "no kidding...she was home like every weekend"). The close relationships at home that i've been able to maintain even over the distance has been a huge blessing and i'm thankful for my awesome friends but I feel like I didn't give myself completely to being here in Gainesville and because of that, I think I missed out on some stuff that God had for me. So, this semester I'm gonna focus on being here and making an impact where God has me right now. Everyone says college is such a great time of life and I don't want to miss out on any of God's plan for my life. I had a really good conversation with my parents before I left and they were just encouraging me to make the most of the opportunity I have to be here for the next couple of years. Just a side note--it's awesome to get to the point of mutual respect with your parents where you're able to see the wisdom that they have to offer you but they also (finally :)) see you more as a peer than a child. Their encouragement and wisdom meant a lot to me and it was cool to get to a new place in my relationship with them. Anyways, so I'm fired up about the semester and excited about what God's gonna do. We had Nav prayer night last night and it was refreshing to be with other students that have the same desire to see God work that I do.
Another goal that I have is to be really consistent in reading God's word. I feel like I say that every year and I never do better, but I'm really praying that I will see lots of growth this year. I can't expect to make a difference here if I'm not constantly in touch with the Source of the difference in my life, ya know?
Also, I wanna work out and get in better shape. Everytime I say this my dad laughs at me so I'm gonna show him this semester ;)
Finally, I wanna make straight A's this semester. I don't so much like B's :)
Ok, so those are the goals that I'm feeling led toward and focusing on right now. Now a little about my classes.
I'm taking statistics online. Basically I just watch lectures three days a week and go to a lab once a week. It shouldn't be a big deal. The only problem--my TA is chinese and not so easy to understand but such is life with TAs at a research university I guess :) My world lit class seems cool except that he takes attendance...I hate that b/c that means i have to go to class and it's at 9:30. I guess I'll get over it. The teacher is a white man with a little afro so it will at least be entertaining :) I had my western civ class yesterday but the teacher wasn't there...a different prof just handed out the syllabus so I'm not sure about that class yet. It's at the end of long tuesdays and thursdays so I'm hoping i can stay awake for it. On tuesday and thursday mornings, I have 3 straight hours of psychology...developmental and cognitive. I'm siked about it! My cognitive teacher is very weird but he's a psychology prof so that's expected. He got his Ph.D. at FSU tho so hopefully his education is credible ;) Ok, that's my classes. Dean's list here I come :)